I launched an Indiegogo campaign today. Most people will have the joy of never understanding the stress and anxiety that goes along with doing such a thing. No matter how lame or grand your idea, you are tied to it in a VERY personal way. It means something to you, deeply. You want to be supported in your efforts – not just financially, but emotionally –and in this instance the two blend together in a very strange way. You find yourself elated by those that reach out and support you in any way, and genuinely disappointed by those who don’t. “Kelly, you can’t expect to hit it out of the park everyday”, my sweet husband said. But, I do. I do. I want to hit it out of the park, or I would not bother to play ball.
I didn’t sleep well last night. I had a lot on my mind and there was no settling it. We launched at 10AM and I spent hours in my digital world, working to spread word. My tired eyes and brain stumbled through those most likely to back me up. By 3pm I was at The Left Bank Grill with a glass of chardonnay and a French onion béchamel pizza (beyond bliss and calorie count). I sat quietly and worked through the emails, pushing around numbers, juggling the ‘what if’ scenarios, and forcing out the conversations around me. “I would never go to Europe, there are crazies everywhere just waiting to snatch up Americans”, the elderly, well dressed women at the table next to me declared to her companion. “Oh, I have no problem with Europe” he replied. “Well you have to think about it. You would be crazy not to think about it!” she demanded. I wanted to stand up and proclaim – “Oh for God sake! EUROPE, …REALLY???… EUROPE!!!” Are we such slaves to the wild factions of the world that we are afraid to go to Europe? I contemplated the sacrifices of our ancestors in Europe and beyond, and the chaos that is our current world. I sat quietly and worked, my dumbfounded rage easing off, and the thought slowly entered – “AM I crazy?” No. I’m not crazy. There is as much good, as there is bad, and the balance is tipped by our actions, or lack of them. My heart is not afraid of going, it’s afraid of staying.
Please visit the Mighty Fingers Facing Change campaign here.
Comments
2 Responses to Tipping The Balance
Kelly, your life is lived and written from your heart in tears of joy and pain, equally.
Honestly.
Generously.
Intensely.
Lovingly, too, in its longing for doing more; doing more in concert with others who will reap the rich rewards of being ‘in the arena’ with you.
Don’t stop…and never feel it is YOU that have not measured up to your visions.
Posted by Diane · via thebabblingbrush.com · 79 months ago
Diane, You are the best “pen pal” I’ve ever had. I always appreciate your thoughtful response, your advice, your years of wisdom in a parallel existence. I look forward to the lines crossing one day.
Posted by kelly sullivan · via thebabblingbrush.com · 79 months ago
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